Just Chai

Embracing and Redefining our Cultural Heritage

We upgrade this week from two brown girls to three when our friend, Felicia Dhanani, joins us. We chat about her cultural heritage, what traditions she is passing along to her daughter, her take on cultural appropriation (and what that means in places like the yoga studio), her journey to heal, and how she’s living her best life as a single Mom (you will want to check out her “Lioness Pride” community for single mothers).

In this episode, we discuss:

• Felicia’s quiet space (and cool floor desk!)
• Her cultural identity -- an Indian girl born in America with a Spanish name whose parents are from East Africa with a more progressive mindset
• Differences from traditional Indian culture and how she feels about it today
• Bringing an openness and freedom to raising her daughter when it comes to culture (rather than conflict)
• Code-switching and connection
• Meme culture
• When culture goes mainstream (yoga) -- intention matters
• “We are grasping for something more”
• Amy’s experience in yoga classes
• “Yoga instructors make beautiful, magical things happen (but be authentic)”
• First generation American experience as an Indian
• The mind-body connection
• Expectations vs. reality and authenticity
• Yoga, ayurveda, and asafoetida (and Amy’s childhood)
• Felicia's yoga practice
• Meditation can show up in different ways
• "Knowing something doesn’t make you better than anyone else"
• What Felicia is passing on to her daughter (cultural generational connection)
• A water break
• Conscious parenting - “having the love of family while ensuring the things she’s learning are the things I want her to keep”
• What motivated Felicia to start a community (“Lioness Pride”) for single mothers following her divorce
• “We worked on being divorced...how to get to a good place with ourselves, and with eachother”
• Getting clear so you can focus on what’s most important
• Creating a space for other women struggling with conflict and committed to healing

Find us at justchai.podbean.com

Friendly disclaimer: This podcast and its hosts are not endorsing any of brand names you may hear. Any product names mentioned are simply to add fun, lively color for the conversation. Opinions reflected are our own.

Parenting with Authenticity

Prepare to be inspired to think about parenting from a different perspective---and to think about your own childhood and how you would “re-parent” yourself if you could. We talk with Devin Jae Wilber---photographer, entrepreneur, and Mom to two beautiful children, one with autism--about how showing up authentically as a parent and releasing perfection has given her greater joy and the opportunity to contribute to others. And, we laugh a lot too! In this episode, we talk about:

• Katy Perry and lions
• Introducing Devin Jae Wilber -- “Mom extraordinaire” + photographer + entrepreneur
• The “Mom” expectations
• “If I can’t keep a plant alive” 
• Make up your own rules about parenting
• The belief that mothers are supposed to be the CEOs of the house
• Blue hair for picture day
• Trusting the process of exploration for children
• “If you’re going to fall, learn how to fall the right way”
• Shame and growth
• Dealing with different parenting philosophies
• The fallacy of “Pinterest Mom”
• Having a special needs daughter
• “Give everyone a break”
• Showing up imperfectly
• The origins of Devin’s passion for advocacy
• Her daughter’s autism diagnosis
• Doing something meaningful with your anger
• The “First Words Project” at FSU
• Formulating a plan matters---so does gut instinct
• Managing anger -- part of the grief process
• Being a realist and dealing with people that make uninformed remarks
• Protecting parents’ mental health 
• “There’s no playbook”
• Coping with grief
• Devin’s new plan - not taking “no” as no
• We have to be our own advocates

Find us at justchai.podbean.com

Friendly disclaimer: This podcast and its hosts are not endorsing any of brand names you may hear. Any product names mentioned are simply to add fun, lively color for the conversation. Opinions reflected are our own.

Eating with Intention

We’ve all heard the adage, “you are what you eat,” but what does that really mean? We discuss how our childhood and culture shaped our food habits, vegetarianism, and how to add intention to your daily diet with some humor, stories, and sass. In this episode, we talk about:

• Amy’s morning oatmeal
• How our eating in childhood shaped our eating as adults
• The scarcity mindset
• The origin story of Sultana’s vegetarianism
• “How did we not know that chicken came from chicken?”
• The celebratory aspects of meat
• How parents felt about our food choices
• Amy’s Long Island food memories
• “Who cares...eat what you want, be happy”
• It’s easier to eat less meat now
• Ancestry and vegetarianism
• Book recommendation
• Eating meatless at restaurants
• Giving up soda
• Sharing food in relationships
• Becoming intentional about sugar consumption
• The relationship between exercise and food
• Quarantine and overeating
• Making small changes in the diet to see how your body responds
• Suggestions for late night snacking
• Amy's intermittent fasting experience
• The value of breakfast
• Advice for those looking to change food habits
• Combatting quarantine weight

Find us at justchai.podbean.com

Friendly disclaimer: This podcast and its hosts are not endorsing any of brand names you may hear. Any product names mentioned are simply to add fun, lively color for the conversation. Opinions reflected are our own.

Valentine’s Day Edition: Your Love & Relationship Questions, Answered

On this most strange and special of holidays, we are going beyond the greeting card, and supporting our listeners by answering your challenging questions about love and relationships. Your love gurus are here for you! Grab a cup of chai (or coffee or tea) and join us. In this episode, we discuss:

• Amy’s hair + Valentine’s Day plans
• Reversing roles on Valentine’s Days (single to coupled, and coupled to single)
• How Amy made Valentine’s Day special when she was single
• Remembering our “Valentine’s Day Sux” party from college
• Managing Valentine’s Day expectations
• The power of friendship to fill the void
• Fill up your own bucket
• Can love overcome political differences?
• Masters vs. disasters (dealing with minefield topics)
• The 3 ways you can show up in discussions
• Setting an intention for difficult conversations 
• Considering what happened in a person’s life that might inform their strong views
• Recalling Amy’s father’s experience from 1984 and its impact
• Should I stay or should I go?
• You have to invest in yourself
• Look at the things that are easiest to solve
• Happiness doesn’t look the same to every person
• Even though you think things cannot change, things inevitably change
• How have you abandoned yourself?
• The process of journaling as a feedback loop
• Engage in a conversation with yourself
• Struggling with identity issues
• The “Four Horsemen” - considering toxic dynamics in a relationship
• You teach your partner how to treat you
• Dissecting codependency
• Boundaries are necessary to have healthy relationships
• Geometry as an analogy for relationships
• “You have to know where your ‘no’ is”
• Carving out an independent persona
• True love is made up of two individuals
• The body is a messenger
• Everything can change

Find us at justchai.podbean.com

Friendly disclaimer: This podcast and its hosts are not endorsing any of brand names you may hear. Any product names mentioned are simply to add fun, lively color for the conversation. Opinions reflected are our own.

Book Club: “Untamed” By Glennon Doyle

For our first book club selection, we read Glennon Doyle’s memoir, “Untamed.” Direct, compelling, and unapologetic in its delivery, this collection of life snapshots call attention to deeper issues that exist in society, particularly in the way women are taught to behave and move in the world. With Glennon’s strong narrative voice, she delivers a powerful punch to all those who seek to have more life in their life. Whether you’ve read it or not, you will gain a nugget of wisdom from the discussion. In this episode we cover:

• The structure of the book
• How the book is inspiring Amy to write
• Unlearning what isn’t working for you
• A whole family vs. having a specific structure
• Using the cheetah as symbolism for our “taming”
• Reframing our relationship with anger 
• The benefit of listening to an audiobook, especially when it’s a memoir
• Announcing our next book club selection: “The Millionaire Next Door: The Surprising Secrets of America's Wealthy” by Dr. Thomas J. Stanley and William D. Danko

Find us at justchai.podbean.com

Friendly disclaimer: This podcast and its hosts are not endorsing any of brand names you may hear. Any product names mentioned are simply to add fun, lively color for the conversation. Opinions reflected are our own.

Lessons in Inclusion and Compassion from Special Education

Children with special needs can teach us a lot about paying attention, having patience, and demonstrating understanding. We are speaking with Andy, who has spent his career working with children with behavioral health challenges, and he shares his wisdom that can apply for all children and parents (plus, he’s Amy’s significant other, so we can hear him spill the tea!) Grab a cup of chai (or coffee or tea) and join us. In this episode, we discuss:

• Welcoming Andy
• Amy’s annoying habits
• The personalities of Amy and Andy’s doggies
• Defining special needs 
• How to approach labels and language matter 
• “Once you know better, you gotta do better”
• Systematic changes needed in special education
• Preparing our kids for “real life”
• The Importance of being allowed to fail
• The skills for teaching special education apply to all
• You can’t put kids in a box
• Andy takes a break, hilarity ensues
• “One of the best things a school can do, is expose you to people who are not like you”
• A story of discrimination from another parent
• The critical need for inclusion, and how poor planning can backfire
• “I love those kids”
• Advice for parents with special needs
• Change has to start from the top-down
• What COVID-19 has shown us about education
• Cute lovey dovey talk with Amy and Andy

Find us at justchai.podbean.com

Friendly disclaimer: This podcast and its hosts are not endorsing any of brand names you may hear. Any product names mentioned are simply to add fun, lively color for the conversation. Opinions reflected are our own.

Acting as a Personal Awakening

Have you ever watched a film and felt stunned by the character portrayal or the depth of emotion you felt during a scene? Our friend Crystal knows that experience of memorizing scripts, diving into a role, and going deep within to tap a source of vulnerability. Once an artistic and extroverted child, life led her down a different path. As she became a mother and began thinking how life could look differently for her, she took acting classes, which transformed her. Your two favorite brown girls have a fun and inspiring conversation with Crystal about the process and art of acting, and the empowering decision to create. Grab a cup of chai (or coffee or tea) and join us. In this episode we discuss:

• How we describe Crystal
• Friends with "X-Men superpowers"
• What you learn in acting school
• Going into a scene with confidence
• Amy’s acting dreams and move to Orlando
• “You can do that at any point in life”
• Crystal twinning with Sultana’s Mom
• Amy’s model Mama
• How acting positively affected Crystal’s life
• The impact on Crystal of losing her acting mentor
• How the Meisner technique can keep you present
• “The birds are singing again”
• Motherhood inspired Crystal to pursue acting
• “We didn’t know our parents were human beings with actual desires”
• How Crystal’s parents inspired her creative side
• Acting as “permission to express” and vulnerability
• Crystal’s favorite movie and how it impacted her
• The challenge of taking on risky, gritty roles
• Emotional awareness as empathy and compassion
• The power of imagination...kids need time to “be bored” so they can create
• What did you love doing as a child?
• You can’t stop to think when you are doing improv

Find us at justchai.podbean.com

Friendly disclaimer: This podcast and its hosts are not endorsing any of brand names you may hear. Any product names mentioned are simply to add fun, lively color for the conversation. Opinions reflected are our own.

 

Who Am I?

Identity is an important part of how we live, who we spend time with, and how we make decisions. Ultimately, it comes to define us...but your two favorite brown girls believe that you have power and choice to shape that direction. While there are certain pieces of identity, including culture, that you take throughout life; you can evolve who you become. Through sharing personal stories of identity, we hope to help you in considering your own (and of course, expect some laughter). Grab a cup of chai (or coffee or tea) and join us. In this episode, we discuss:

• Amy’s Pink Floyd sweater
• The freedom of aging
• How identity changes over the years
• Sultana’s fourth-grade writings
• TV as the “third parent”
• Amy’s active imagination
• The duality of self and cultural code-switching
• Faking qualities as you grow up
• “Just be yourself” as an American concept
• Who people say they are vs. who they actually are
• Creating your world 
• Re-reading old diaries
• Evolving your identity as you grow
• The “token brown girl”
• “Do you lift, bro?"
• Live Google search
• Form the clay before it hardens
• Try on identities to find what fits
• How Amy’s experience in palmistry helped her heal
• Therapy as unraveling identity
• The body knows
• Your permission slip to be yourself
• Some special effects (and a bhangra break)
• Relating differently to friends and the grief of loss
• “Once you see it, you can’t un-see it”
• Permission-based language is new
• Amy’s LA dream
• We can be all the things

Find us at justchai.podbean.com

Friendly disclaimer: This podcast and its hosts are not endorsing any of brand names you may hear. Any product names mentioned are simply to add fun, lively color for the conversation. Opinions reflected are our own.

Tuning In To Your Intuition

We are featuring a unique conversation on Amy’s porch on a windy day (safe and social distanced) recorded over the holiday break with Sultana’s mother, Marybeth. As a “clairvoyant” related to other naturally intuitive women, Marybeth has shared spiritual visions and readings to help people over the years. We go behind the cards and astrology charts to talk about intuition and faith. Grab a cup of chai (or coffee or tea) and join us for an interesting, vulnerable conversation. 

In this episode we discuss:

• Introducing Sultana’s mother, Marybeth
• What is intuition? (e.g. “when life slaps you in the face”)
• Aunt Sophie’s spiritual insight
• “We already know what to do…”
• Marybeth’s religious upbringing and her first vision
• Intuition and women
• The body as a messenger
• “What do I need napkins for?”
• Lessons learned from her brother
• Trusting yourself
• Intuition tools--dreams, palmistry, etc.
• Dealing with negativity
• A Pollyana perspective
• “Let it go”
• The mind as a filter (and “The Matrix”)
• Demonstrating compassion toward others

Find us at justchai.podbean.com

Friendly disclaimer: This podcast and its hosts are not endorsing any of brand names you may hear. Any product names mentioned are simply to add fun, lively color for the conversation. Opinions reflected are our own.

Announcing: Just Chai "Book Club"

Since we are talking about resolutions, we want to read more this year. Perhaps this thought resonates with you. So your two favorite brown girls are starting a Just Chai "book club." We will select a book to read every month or so and announce it, and then we will discuss it in a special segment in an upcoming episode (and perhaps even invite a special reader to join us!). Our first selection for January is Glennon Doyle's inspiring and fiery memoir, "Untamed." Please read along with us!

And we want to hear from you--what books would you like to read in 2021? What are your reading goals? Join the conversation at www.facebook.com/JustChaiPodcast